Often what holds people back from either starting their own business, or expanding their current one, is a lack of self-confidence.
In my previous article, “What Is Blocking Your Success?“ we saw how a lack of confidence and low self-esteem can contribute to subconscious limits that can hold you back – and even keep you from seeing the opportunities that are right in front of you! But…
Is a lack of confidence something that you just have to live with?
One phrase I hear over and over again is: “That’s just the way I am.”
When perhaps they really should be saying, “This is the way I choose to be… based on my fears, habits and limited beliefs.” (I know it doesn’t feel like a choice, but hear me out.)
Most people are very willing to ACCEPT a limitation upon themselves or their business. They think that “It’s just the way I am” is a FACT… when it’s really more of an excuse not to change.
Why in the world do we look for an excuse NOT to change? We are MEANT to change. We are changing beings. Our bodies and minds are literally changing all the time.
Think about it.
Are you the same person you were when you were five years old? No!
In those years, you have learned. You have grown. You have discovered and defined the behaviors and mindset that WORK for you – that are more aligned with who you want to be. You’re not even the same person you were a year ago. In fact, you are under no obligation to be the same person you thought you were YESTERDAY!
So how do you GET confidence if it isn’t already part of your identity?
In the same way that plants grow better and more healthy in fertile soil, you can shift your mindset and change your environment to one which encourages your confidence (and your business!) to grow stronger and healthier.
These are five of my top “shifts” that will lead to a bigger, bolder business and a more confident, better You!
1 ) Hold a Positive Self-Image. (This includes respecting yourself and your work)
Learn to look at the positive things about yourself and focus on those rather than the negative. It doesn’t mean that you have to think that everything about you is perfect and that everything you do is fantastic… sometimes it means recognizing that something you did could have been handled better.
Recognize that if you can SEE better, you can DO better.
When you see something that could be better about yourself, what you are seeing is actually your POTENTIAL! If you see a lot of areas where you don’t measure up, you are actually seeing how AMAZING you could potentially be! Just don’t beat yourself up for not being there already.
Certainly, own up to your mistakes and to areas where you could improve, but hold even more tightly to the idea that you are pure potential, still “in development,” learning and growing with every experience.
And along those same lines…
2) Use the words “I am” Carefully and Consciously
Any time you say “I am” you are accepting (or revealing) a belief about yourself, so OWN that.
Don’t say anything after “I am” that you don’t want to accept as part of who you are as a person.
You are literally PROGRAMMING your own subconscious as to who you want to be.
And if you are looking for an affirmation, one of the most powerful affirmations you can use is, ‘I am able.”
- I am able to double my income this year
- I am able to learn
- I am able to follow my passions
- I am able to own a successful business
Take these 3 simple words to heart in the morning and you’ll be surprised what you can accomplish each day.
Henry Ford said it best, “Whether you think that you can or you can’t, you’re usually right.”
3) Acknowledge forward momentum, no matter how small.
If you are moving forward, even if it is less than half a step forward, take a moment and celebrate that you aren’t moving backward. And that you aren’t standing still.
Sometimes we take leaps and bounds forward – but mostly our lives are made up of the little steps – our daily choices.
Think of it as like any other investment. Slow steady gains in your business add up and before you know it, you are way ahead of the game.
Even physically, if you keep moving forward, a year from now you will be in a completely new place – no matter how small the steps. So acknowledge that and celebrate it with EVERY move forward.
Because when you celebrate the small wins it invites the BIG WINS into your life!
4) Have a Support System that encourages confidence.
That doesn’t seem like much to ask, but you’d be surprised.
Be discerning when you look at your current support system. Actively seek out those that have one of the following qualities:
- You feel supported by them psychologically.
Personally, that means that they see VALUE in you. There are those people that make you feel better and stronger, just by being around them. Because you know they value you.
In business, it means those that share your ideas and visions for your company. They see the value of what you provide, what the business has to offer and their role in helping offer that service or product to others.
- You feel encouraged by them.
In business this is EXTREMELY important. You don’t need limiting beliefs and voices – especially UNINFORMED beliefs and voices.
It’s amazing how encouraging those who have succeeded in their own business or marketing efforts are – but that’s because they have done it! They know it’s possible.
Surround yourself with those that BELIEVE. Seek out mentors that know it, have done it and actively encourage you to reach for more!
And in your daily life, be on the lookout for those people that reflect and reinforce your “possibility” thoughts – rather than your “impossiblity” thoughts. We all have a crowd of doubting voices living in our heads – we don’t need to add more outside voices to reinforce those.
And this is important: Remember that YOU need to be that person to those around you.
YOU need to be the one that encourages and sees the possibilities. Allow yourself to be the Support System that others need.
Trust me when I say that highly successful business people that you encounter have no interest in having people around them that stifle their flow or bring down their energy.
So, if you want more people around you that are highly successful, become the type of supportive person that they are looking for. You’ll also find that as you become more supportive and encouraging to others, you will also become more so with yourself and your own efforts.
5 ) You are co-creating
Lastly, one of the strongest tools you have in your “confidence belt” is faith that it’s not you alone doing anything.
There is a power stronger than yourself that moves through you. Partnering and Co-creating in all your endeavors. In reality, it doesn’t matter what you call it: The Universe, Destiny, God, Your Higher Self, The “Force” or your “unique and personal connection to the creative power of the cosmos.”
Whatever you call it, that mental and emotional shift of feeling that you can turn something over to a higher power — and have action move THROUGH you — is an amazing confidence boost.
Suddenly, you aren’t fighting all the psychological blocks of thinking YOU can’t do something.
Suddenly you are ALLOWING something BIGGER than yourself to work through you.
And the confidence you were unable to show yourself alone, is suddenly there when you feel bolstered with your secret backup. Because no matter how large the situation in front of you, it pales in comparison to what you have backing you up.
So there you have it! Five very simple shifts in thinking.
But as simple as they are, they are incredibly POWERFUL! Really let them sink in.
Read through them a few times and think about how you might implement one or two of these shifts in your life today. If one touched you especially, CLAIM IT. Talk about it with others.
Share in the comments section below. It doesn’t just help other people looking for inspiration, but it also lets your subconscious know that this information is important so that it will help you behind the scenes (when you’re not actively thinking about it.)
Note: Please know that we greatly appreciate all of your thoughts and ideas but to try and cut down on people trying to spam our site, we automatically delete comments with links to websites or videos on other sites.
So remember, you truly deserve to be confident! There is no one else quite like you. You are a unique expression in this world.
Engage with the world and allow your unique-ness to be shared.
We’ll all be grateful you did. 🙂
Would you rather listen?
I think this article can really help you start to cultivate confidence. So if you don’t have time to read it right now – or if you would just rather listen – I’ve recorded this audio for you. Feel free to listen to it here, or download it to listen later.
To Listen Click the Play Button Below:
Bolder In Business
(right click to save/download to listen later)
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Great information. You break it down into simple thoughts that can be implemented by all of us.
Thank you so much! That means a lot because that’s exactly what I’m trying to do. 🙂
It really a boosting energy…These words are injecting energy through me. Thanks a lot
Thanks for the feedback, Jijo! It’s always good to know when things really hit the mark. 🙂
thanks for these thought shifts, it’s really good to read the things you already know but forget doing for yourself 😉
🙂 My pleasure. “Thought shifts” are wonderful. Such a simple phrase. But they can change the world. 🙂
After reading this post, I thought, yes I can and I must keep positive thoughts like “I AM Sure I want to write and get paid. Thanks for the backup and the forward push to do so. Confidence is the best push to do anything. Reminders can also do that. You have done both. Thank you much.
Wonderful, Viola! Confidence can work wonders. And a supportive community is crucial when things don’t immediately go how we’d like them to. I’m glad to hear you’re keeping positive!
Thanks a lot Sabrina! “I am able” and “the force that is backing us up ” are such an inspiring thoughts! It is much easier to handle with problems and challenges with this mind set.
Thanks, Mariam! I’m glad to hear that resonates! 🙂
Thank you Sabrina. “Half a step forward” is brilliant. Thank you again.
Thank you so much! Glad to hear it resonates with you!
I am, successful. Thank you, Sabrina! I love watching you, so skinny and beautiful. I loved watching you interview Carl James Harvey. So much beautiful energy. You look like a life size barbie doll.
Hi Jo! That made me laugh. Thanks for the kind words.
I’ve spent a long time fighting self limiting beliefs, but I’ve always known that I’m destined for bigger things and I felt quite tearful earlier that although it’s taken me so long to get here and learn everything that I have learned, I’ve been on this journey for a reason and it’s made me who I am now. Over the last few months I’ve received so much knowledge and help to be more confident in myself and I know that once the success hits, it will hit big time! Thank you Sabrina xx
Exactly, Dionne. What we go through shapes us. The most interesting things people have to share (and what they feel the most growth from) are those points along the path when they met challenges and took the opportunity to let it clarify for them who they wanted to be. 🙂 Seeing it is half the battle.
It is really encouraging and also supports what really happens in our lives.
Thank you, Paul! And welcome to the conversation! 🙂
Thanks Sabrina. The point l like most is `to acknowledge forward momentum, no matter how small’.
Mostly when we make small steps forward we tend to ignore them.
A great article.
Exactly, Fred! So often we focus on what we still have to do and forget to celebrate what we’ve already done. 🙂
I’m finding it amazing how often I’m hearing the same lessons over & over! I feel like I’m on the right path to growth.
Absolutely encouraging, supportive and essential information. I am confident in all of my undertakings, but these 5 tips will be my constant reminder…Thanks a million.
Thank you for your kind words!! Much love!
I am so happy that I came across this article today My husband and I are embarking on some exciting changes for 2018. Your ideas covered will help keep us focused on our new journey! You put some of my fears into persepective. Thank you
Welcome, Debbie. I always liked that acronym for FEAR (False Evidence Appearing Real). In a dimly lit room, you can see a rope and think it’s a snake. But with a little light, things become much more clear. 🙂
Great read today, it affirmed me that there is truly a greater force out there to urge me on and I can rely on this. I’m able to CONQUER ANYTHING!
Yes you are!!! Go for it, Michael!
I loved all these, how I. Need to be reminded of them! But it was your last tip that really caught me. So often when facing a lot of challenges I forget that I’m not on my own. Things are difficult for me at the moment and it cheered me no end to be reminded that the Source field is there supporting us, that we are all connected and love is the most powerful emotion of all. Your other tip about being a support network for others is actually about love as well. When we try to help and encourage people in the way we would like to be supported, we are sharing love.
Exactly, Rosalinda. So often people forget that they are part of the solution equation as well. BEING the support you’re looking for often accelerates our own growth. Love is always the answer. <3
Thank you Sabrina for this lesson I’ve learned a lot you’ve inspired me and helped me to see a whole different picture of myself thanks again.
Thank you so much for your kind words, Andrea. That’s exactly what I strive for, so it’s great to hear when people are touched. 🙂
Good stuff Sabrina! I was curious though. Do you take the time to reply to all the comments posted on your blog posts, or your just make an arbitrary decision to do it?
Hi Sangeeta! Thanks! And, the INTENTION is to reply to all the comments. 🙂 Sometimes life gets in the way and it takes me a while to get to them. I obviously don’t reply to the spammy comments or ones that aren’t in alignment with the supportive and nurturing environment we’re creating here. So, there’s a loving method to the madness. <3
Hi Sabrina, thank you so very much!
What you have written here is truly enlightening and inspirational!
I have never seen potential in the way that you have described it here.
I have suffered for years with an emotional sensation which I can only describe as a huge fear of failure which has often stopped me moving forward.
Because my expectations of myself are so high, I often let myself down.
It’s like trying to build a wall of bricks and laying them 5 at a time, rather than one by one.
Even after taking many steps forward in my life, I can’t seem to shift this fear that haunts me and I carry around with me.
But now, after reading these words you have written, I am almost in tears and so emotional.
I realise now, my fear of failure is me recognising my potential and what is possible for me in my life.
Not things that I could be doing, or should have done by now, but rather, exactly how you described it, “If you can see better you can do better”.
Thank you so much Sabrina, I am going to take action on the big things in my life I have been scared to do for years, like writing my book, moving abroad and fulfilling my goals.
I have waited for years to find new goals to replace the ones I have not yet fulfilled.
But now I realise the dreams and goals I see, are there to help me fulfil my potential and guide me through life.
God bless you Sabrina, I feel so relieved and empowered. Simon XX
You are exactly the reason I do what I do, Simon. Often all it takes is a little shift in perspective when the heart is open to totally transform our whole experience. Treasure these moments and take advantage of them. Journal about how you’re feeling so you can refer back to it in moments that you forget. 🙂 Much love to you!
We need more positive encouragements in this life
Thank you Sabrina
That’s always where I’m coming from so I’m glad people are able to find that here 🙂
that is awesome I will have to read it again but the two that stuck right off the bat are I am able, and to connect with and lean on God or whatever you want to call it.
Lovely to hear! Thank you!
The points that resonate with me is the affirmation, “ I am able”, and to acknowledge every step forward, no matter how small. It’s true that frequently it’s the big shift we feel will validate us. But your suggestion honors EVERYTHING we do on our journey forward. I know I have been guilty of this. Now I feel uplifted and proud of all I am doing to bring about change in my life. I won’t beat myself up for not having a big shift yet because as long as I’m putting my energy and action towards my vision, I am moving forward.
Exactly, Alice. It doesn’t matter the size of the step, as long as it’s in the right direction. 🙂
thank u for the shifts….
and concept of confidence with GROWTH OF PLANTS in presence of healthy soil was very good. Staying positive is bit tough for me but GETTING GOOD POSITIVE SUNLIGHT from reading THESE THOUGHTS boosts and helps to Maintain positivity.
Absolutely! One key trick when we can’t find it in ourselves, is to look for its reflection in others. You can borrow the benefits of others, until it becomes natural in yourself! 🙂
Thanks so much! Just what I needed to hear as I grow my client base!!
Wonderful, Sandi! I love hearing that!
It’s so much easier to feel anything is possible when it’s the creator doing it rather than thinking it’s me/the self doing it.Thank you.This one I claim.
So right, Shamal. Just do what you can and let it happen. 🙂
I’m all the way in the island of Jamaica. I’ve found this article to be quite useful and practical. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Welcome from Jamaica!! Thank you so much for your kind words! 🙂
Thanks Sabrina. I love how simple & direct your advice is. Keep going!
Thanks Cor! I do try to break things down to be simple and direct. Makes it easier to understand. 🙂
“you can shift your mindset and change your environment to one which encourages your confidence (and your business!) to grow stronger and healthier.”
I love this, it’s really impacting in my life right
Wonderful, Michael! Thanks for sharing that! It’s amazing how one little sentence can be the tipping point in our lives sometimes 🙂
Thanks Sabrina for sharing wonderful insights on how we stop our own growth with self limiting beliefs. The thing I liked the most was that we often say that’s the way I am. I should rather be saying that I have chosen to be like that. It is a choice I have made based on my habits, limiting beliefs and fears. And this is nothing but finding an excuse for not changing. We are all meant to change. Retuning our subconscious mind by positive affirmations of I AM ABLE was just classic. Pl keep sharing and enlightening us
God bless you.
Yes, Rajeev… choice is our greatest power, for good or bad! 🙂
Simplicity shines as a beacon from your points and it is refreshing to get away from the clutter, and focus on the simple truths which we mostly ignore, thank you.
Thank you, Andy, for taking the time to let us know it hit home with you! 🙂
Simple but powerful reminders thanx Sabrina.x
Thank you, Tania! Glad it resonated with you!
Thanks, Sabrina. Very practicable actions suggested.
I really enjoyed this. Thank you for sharing your wisdom! I am working hard at creating my own brand and success. My favorite part was your point about believing in something bigger than you. I have never thought about how it can give us confidence. But you are right! It does!!
Absolutely, Cyndi! Somehow it’s easier to believe in a higher power than in ourselves sometimes. 🙂
Thanks so so much this is what I really need at the moment and you made it so simple.
Thanks also for the free ebooks.
So glad to hear that, Nkiruka!